Bello! That’s actually Hello in minion language but I think it means Stupid in Malay.
This entry will prolly be the cutest one I’ve written to date. I’m actually not really into animated, cartoon characters but something about the minions, they could really make me squeal and die because of their adorableness.
The first movie, Despicable Me was aired more than a decade ago. I remembered being at the cinema, with my googly eyes and I was just aww-ing at most of the scenes because the minions are just too cute. I never really had an obsession with plushies or soft toys but because of them, my bed was full of them!
Of course when I heard that they’re opening up the Minion Pop-up Cafe, I definitely had to be there!
Sometime ago, they too opened a minion pop-up cafe in Orchard but I missed the chance then so I was truly excited when they decided to open up another one again. This time, in Clarke Quay!
The minion cafe was located at Block A of Clarke Quay. It really is convenient if you’re taking a private-hire car to get there, the drop-off is just in front of the cafe.
The entrance of the cafe was beyond adorable, with two Kevins just there waiting for your arrival. If you’re lost and unable to find the cafe, the facade of the cafe is super obvious and striking with the bright colors of the decal stickers pasted all over the exterior of the cafe.
From the windows to the external pillars of the cafe, everything was pasted with abstracts of the minions. It’s ridiculous how cute it really was! The vibe was amazing.
Highly recommended to make a reservation before coming here. When it first opened in late October, the whole cafe was booked for the whole month! The staffs were great and quick. They’re really attentive too. I had all my reservations done but I had to wait for a friend so I was standing outside the cafe, alone. The staff actually walked and went up to me to offer me a menu while I was waiting there anxiously. Little gestures like these really makes the whole experience memorable.
When you first enter the cafe, two Stuarts will be there to greet you. Just look at how fat and cuddly they are! And no, they are not animatronics. They’re unable to move, sadly. Imagine how cute would it be if they somehow can move, wave and talk? I wanna bring 10 of them home!
Like the exterior of the cafe, the interior is also pasted with whimsical decals all over. I enjoyed the different wallpapers and photos of the minions, mainly because I love bright colors. Minions turning into popsicles? Insanely cute!
I’m incredibly obsessed with this beautiful piece of Stuart with the popsicle and cupcake. Yes, I was squealing when I was there just gazing at the art canvas. Truly obsessed. I prolly looked like those art-enthusiasts admiring the Mona Lisa painting in Paris!
Despite all the bright colors of the decals, notice how dark and heavy some part the whole cafe looks. There was barely natural sunlight coming through the windows. It looks like a steakhouse, somehow.
I did a quick google search and found out that the space used to be an irish pub, McGettigan’s, before they closed down and converted it into the minion cafe.
(Photo above from Google)
Just look at how beautiful and dark the pub used to be. Their last update was early this year in January, where they told their customers on Facebook that they were closing for renovations. I guess whatever they planned wasn’t a success?
(Photo above from Google)
You can definitely see the comparison.
The articulate design on the ceiling, the sophistication of the irish pub is still visible despite having the bright-colored minion decals pasted on the counters.
The photo above was taken from Google, during the set-up of the minion cafe. Notice how the McGettigan’s logo was still there.
Let’s move on to the food and beverages. Fret not, I ordered the cutest ones so you’ll know what to get when you come here! Click here to see the full menu.
We’ll start off with the beverages we ordered! As a caffeine-addict, I definitely have to order coffee to start off my day. So I got the Minion Latte ($6.50), and I swear it was the cutest latte I’ve ever ordered in my whole entire life.
While it tasted like the normal coffee you get from hotel’s coffee machine, the printed design of the minions on the latte is just on a whole another level. It was so adorable, it was so hard for me to stir it. My heart couldn’t take it!
If you order this, keep in mind that you aren’t allowed to choose which minion you want to get printed as your latte art. I didn’t mind it at all cause all the minions are cute!
We also ordered the Minion Banana Drink ($9). Oh my god, you guys. Biggest mistake of our lives. Prolly one of the most pathetic ones from the menu.
Maybe I should rename this drink for you, the Banana Milk from Dutch Lady, with Cornflakes on top.
Because that’s what it is. You could get this drink for a mere $1 from NTUC or Giant, because Giant always have great offers. Love them. Anyways! Can’t believe the people who opened the minion cafe would exploit the minion brand just to overhype the price. They just added a “minion” straw to give the beverage a whole minion look. Obviously, I fell for it! Hmm. Not sure whose fault is it now.
All that disappointments got me hungry. For starters, we ordered the Minion Pumpkin Mantou with Chilli Crab Dip ($15). I love mantou buns. But mantou buns that looks like minion? Take my money!
The buns were soft and fluffy, just the way I like it. I don’t taste any pumpkins though? But no doubt, the buns are the stars of the show cause the dip was beyond disappointing. It doesn’t even taste like chilli crab, which is ironic cause it’s literally one of our national dish and anyone could get the recipe right. It tasted sour and flavorless, not the best combination.
For the mains, we had the Minion Wagyu Cheeseburger ($32) and I honestly didn’t like this either. It tasted like a $3 hamburger from McDonalds. While it is not a major negative feedback, it’s not a compliment either.
For that price, I’ve had better burgers with REAL patties elsewhere. Nothing special about the wagyu patty either. If you wanna get super good burgers, Black Tap has great ones! The minion burger is just a big no from me. It’s dry, boring and just.. no.
But! I’ll give points to where credit is due. They do look super cute! Although mine looked like it got hit in the head but it’s the effort that counts! Definitely a very insta-worthy dish, I must say. Plus, the fries and the onion rings wasn’t that bad either. I mean, you can never go wrong with onion rings right?
To end, we ordered the Minion Box-shaped Minion Castella Cake ($18) for dessert. Such a long-winded name for something that you can get from NTUC for $5.
Unlike the other dishes, nothing about this one was cute. The spongecake, or castella cake rather was so dry, you could choke if you didn’t order any drinks. Thank god we ordered our overpriced banana milk now, no? God works in mysterious ways.
The cake was served together with a mango puff and a blackcurrant sorbet on the side which again, is just a mixture of stuffs you can get from a hypermarket. Nothing really screams the cuteness of the minions. In fact, the only way they tried to make this dish cute is just by adding a pathetic minion googly eyes on the mango puff. Oh, and a GRU logo on the cake.
Despite the menu being so underwhelming, I truly enjoyed my time here. Visuals of my food are always important to me than the taste, so I somehow didn’t mind the mediocrity of the menu here. Although, I do agree that the prices are super steep for a menu that is so simple and disappointing. It was just a mix and match of what they could get from NTUC. It’s a little upsetting, honestly.
I’ve always paid for experiences anyway, so I’m glad that I actually came. Not only because I love the minions, but also to share about the food that they offer here.
While the menu for the Minion Cafe is free of pork and lard, it is not halal certified.
Food and drinks aside, I appreciate them doing up pop-up cafes like this, so minion-niacs like me can just over and squeal till we explode. Also, during the pandemic, there’s only a few exciting events going on. Come on down and support the businesses that are trying their best to stay afloat.
If you love the minions or have kids that are obsessed with all the Despicable Me movies, you totally should come here. Not only do they have food, but they have a whole space that sells all the cute minion merchandise.
It caters mostly to the kids but adults can get a thing or two too! I personally love the plushies, but I have tons of them waiting for me at home.
The lunchboxes are super cute too. I am obsessed with lunchboxes, but again, it’s too kiddy for me.
Do make your reservations quick cause the pop-up cafe will close its doors early next year in January. From 22 November onwards, the government has increased the gathering limit to 5! Time to bring all your family and friends here.
I’ll put up their information here for your easy reference:
3A River Valley Road, Merchant’s Court
#01-01C to 01D, Block A Clarke Quay
Singapore 179020
Email: reservation@minioncafe.sg
Contact: +65 9726 0307
I really do hope you enjoy the food more than I do! Get some plushies for me while you’re there.
Poopaye! (That’s goodbye in the minion language!)
Aliff Daniel 